The Road to a new life... Self-Discovery

Who am I?  What am I doing?  What am I supposed to do?  Who am I supposed to become?  What is my purpose in life?  Where did I come from?  Where am I going?  How will I get there?  These are questions that come up on a somewhat regular basis for me.  At least they've been coming up ever since my latest job search began.  

April of 2012 I was presented with an opportunity.  There comes  a point in life when you realize you've been too safe.  I've been safe and predictable for years. The opportunity was a risky one to say the least.  In August 2011 I bought a house.  I have the full financial responsibility of the house on my shoulders.  There is no one here to help me with finances.  I am 100% fully self-supporting.  The thought of leaving my stable and secure job was one of the most difficult choices I've ever made.

I looked at the pros and cons.  I weighed my options.  I thought about all the worse case scenarios.  Then I did it!  I took the leap in faith.  I gave my two weeks notice on May 10, 2012.  I went to work every day for the next two weeks.  I made myself available to do what needed to be done.  The next day I went on vacation!  Who would have thought that I'd ever leave the job and go on vacation? I traveled to Canada.  I stayed in Toronto for a few days.  I went on a few mini adventures in Canada.  I found my way through the city using public transportation.

I took a day trip down to Niagara Falls.  What an amazing experience that was!  I went on the Maid of the Midst.  I stood at the railing of that boat and was overwhelmed with awe.  I realized what a small part I play in this great big world.  Do you believe I took this picture?  The beautiful scenery of the Falls can make anyone feel like a National Geographic's Photographer.

When I finally made it back to New Jersey after a week long vacation in a foreign land I started my new job.  It was fun and exciting!  The office was buzzing with commotion.  The desks were still being built, the furniture needed to be assembled, the bathroom was still being installed.  I literally started out here on the "ground floor".  I got everything set up and ready to go.  It was pretty slow in the beginning.  A brand new real estate office opening in the heart of Cape May City in the beginning of the summer.  We had our first walk in clients 6 days after the doors opened.

It's been a stressful part of the journey to say the least.  I got the office up and running, the new agent trained, websites configured, programs installed and running, you name it, I've done it.  Last month (August) the boss told me that he wasn't sure what was going to happen with the office and the company.  He said it would be a good idea if I started to look for work elsewhere.  When you're in the situation I'm in a conversation like that will freak you out!

I looked for a job for a few days.  The boss came back to me told me to stop looking for a job, everything is going to work out everything will be fine.  That wasn't enough for me.  I needed something more.  What I learned in my three day job search was that there aren't a lot of jobs in Cape May County.  I decided that in order for me to stay and to feel a litle bit secure I would need him to pay for me to get my real estate license.  With a real estate license at least I would have something to fall back on if anything happened.  I'd be able to attempt to become a realtor or an assistant.  Whereas right now my only option is something in the administrative field.  

The boss and I talked about it and he agreed that that would be a good idea.  He asked that we wait until October since the fall is a busy time of year in real estate - he didn't want to loose me for two weeks during the busy time.  I don't know why I was surprised the second week in September when he changed his mind again.  Once again he said, it might be a good idea for me to find another job!  I was crushed and devastated.  Being single and not having anyone to reach out to or depend on is difficult in times of financial distress isn't easy.